10 Things I Never Imagined I'd Say as a Mommy

Ah, motherhood. Rewarding. Demanding. Fun. Hard. Awesome and surprising. Some of the things that have come out of my mouth as I care for my toddler son make me shake my head and wonder, "did I actually just say that!?"

Here are some of my favorites so far: 

1. "How on earth did your shoe get in the kitchen sink?" 

2. "Eat your carrots." I hate carrots. But they are good for him. If anyone ever hears me tell him to eat his brussel sprouts, you might as well lock me up. I'll have gone mad.

3. "Please don't eat the flowers." Life is so unfair.

4. "Stinky, stinky, stinky! Peeeee uuuuuuuu!" It's impossible to hold your nose when changing a diaper...

5. "The trash can is not a toy!" What is it about the dang trash can?!

6. "Don't suck on the washcloth." Because rubber ducks are boring, apparently.

7. "Son, we don't put pillows in the bathtub."

8. "Give me the snake!" It's a toy, but still!

9. "Honey, it's broken. Things break when you throw them down stairs." And I'm secretly thankful that I'll never have to hear that toy beep again.

10. "Yay! You pooped!" You just can't understand this until you're a mom, but once you are, you totally get it.

I'm sure that a few months from now I'll have another list to compile for you.  There's never a dull moment around here...and I wouldn't have it any other way!